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24 September 2013 @ 12:41 am
love letter from my unconscious  
A translation from a memory of a dream, read in a non-language.

"I know you're sad

so I brought you the open sky before dusk
when it's soft
and the clouds are thin
and yellow and orange and pink

do you remember
the first time you tried to paint it
in crayons
and you used a fuchsia one
because you were so fascinated that clouds could look that color
but it looked nothing like the clouds
and you felt really angry and sad

it's ok if you can't color clouds
you know them

I brought you sparkles
like the ones that go off in your eyes
and real stars

you feel bad often
you've forgotten to forget
to pay no mind

so you close your eyes with your head high and walk

on a highwire
through broken glass
rusty nails
scalding asphalt
gentle grass
and flowers

you close your eyes and walk in an out of dark rooms
and bright rooms
and houses

as one who knows the way
always unafraid

but you close your eyes and hold your breath

because you are afraid


that the tears you've been holding in may run down your cheeks like waterfalls

instead of welling up inside your eyelids
of swelling them
and sealing them shut at the lashes


so I brought you
an ocean
with lazy waves


because
because you've kept your eyes shut,
your other senses are exhausted

and you've forgotten to see your reflection

you:
you are the sky
you are the sea

in your eyes
stars and salt water

and I know

your real voice breaks
your real voice disappears

so you write letters
and letters
and letters in your sleep,

where you tie them to a fish's tail

and somebody knows

whether somebody cares
shouldn't matter
doesn't matter

whether anyone cares
shouldn't matter
but it matters to you


to flicker,
in an out
of the conciousness of the world

but you will never be invisible, you know
not while you have a body

so you can only hide it
hide your body between walls
between fabrics and colors

when all you ever wanted to hide was you
when all you ever wanted to expose was you

but your soul is invisible/but your soul is not invisible
not while there are people in the world

but your soul is customized, altered, mis-reconstructed
as long as there are people in the world



and now you know

that somebody knows who you are

because

you tied them to a fish's tail"
 
 
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
 
 
 
abiotique on September 25th, 2013 01:26 pm (UTC)
<3
edogaa on November 4th, 2013 04:33 am (UTC)
O.O
wow, this is truly amazing